Coming to America: The Reality

Everyone we see in Abu Dhabi is preparing to leave.  It is a mass-exodus come mid-June and it is just short of a mandatory evacuation for women and children .  So naturally, as you see friends and acquaintances, the main topic of conversation is: When do you leave? Which airline did you book? how long will you stay, where will you stay.. etc. etc.   We can all identify and relate to each other since every one travels outta here during the summer.  On the other side of the world our families and friends are doing cartwheels and countdowns…. so are we, but maybe it would be beneficial for others to understand the downside of this summer travel stuff..

Beginning with packing: Have you ever tried to pack for a trip lasting longer than 2 weeks? Pretty tough, huh.. Then try 6 weeks. that’s 42 days folks. The shirts, shorts, jeans, dresses, undies, pj’s, the accessories, the shoes… THE SHOES – this is where I struggle with deciding… all of this but multiply by 4 people.  My head hurts just thinking about it.  Good news is that America is the land of plenty and if we don’t have it, we buy it.  once the suitcases are packed – the carry on is the real booger. This one bag is a serious project that I plan & pack for days. The carry-on could be a whole blog post by itself… I strategically choose activities, download surprise aps and movies to the ipad, buy junk toys and junk food and pack it is special ways just so our kids will be entertained on the flight.

Oh yes, the flight:  A pretty expensive ride.  It is painful to drop about 7K to a trip anywhere, let alone – Lake Charles, Louisiana… for that kinda cash I’m thinking the south of Spain. Ok. whatever we signed up for this so we just suck it up.  Want to know what it is like on the flight? The flight seats are the same exact as if you were just flying to Mexico... so no, we do not get seats that lay into beds or any of that fabulousness… that’s business class which costs about a bazillion dollars.   OK, lets do a pretend exercise here. Go to the dining room and line up three chairs as closely as possible.  then closely line up three more chairs in front of you, (one of which some jerk will inevitably recline) You sit in one chair and have a 6 year old and a 4 year old sit next to you… then put a 9 month old baby on your lap {who you’ll most likely wrestle with the entire time since she will just want to get down and crawl}……. Now sit there for 16 1/2 hours YES SIXTEEN.  Don’t worry, flight attendants will bring you food and leave the tray in front of you for about an hour… that is really fun when the kids take all of 10 minutes to not really eat the airline food and then have to maneuver around it for the next hour. you’ll do that 3 times. And yes, there’s a bathroom and luckily the kids will stagger their need to use the facility so you can make a constant path back and forth  -  To see what this is like, go in the smallest closet you can find with one of the kids while you assist in wiping, flushing and hand washing.  now that’s fun.  Simultaneously, you’ll have to deal with bottle washing and diaper changing in sub-sanitary conditions. 

Kids, You want cookies? SURE! Candy? ABSOLUTELY!! Here, have some more..! Whatever they want – We don’t care. This is survival.  The best part is when they FINALLY go to sleep and you cover them with blankets on the floor – I’ve even sprinkled a few toys and crayons on top of them so they are camouflaged from the flight attendants.  If they discover your child sleeping on the floor they will make you wake them up and put them back in the seat to buckle them up.  If ever there is a moment for you to want to punch someone in the face this is it.  Surely they’ve never made a flight half way around the world with their own children.

The Jet lag:  Oh joy. this truly is a mom’s worst nightmare.  I see so many people complaining on facebook about daylight savings time. Y’all it is one hour. ONE.  lets multiply that times 10 and literally try to switch your kids days to nights and nights to days.  This makes you just want to die. The kids will wake up in the night wanting things like turkey sandwiches and Doritos because their body thinks it is lunch time when it is 2 am.  They wake up one. at. a. time. all. night. long. and will do this for oh, lets say the next 5-7 nights.  The daytime is not too bad until around 4 pm. They pass out like limp noodles as you try to keep them awake {but you are equally exhausted} you need them to be awake now so you can finally get one freaking nights sleep.   I bribe them with slushies, candy, popsicles, you name it – whatever it takes to wake them up.

Imagine being the tiredest you’ve ever been, like when your eyeballs burn and your muscles ache kinda tired and having to pretend to be a rodeo clown jumping around, back and forth between 3 kids begging for them to stay awake.  I would take a newborn any day over this crap. Having just done this in trip December, the wounds have not yet healed. I feel like I’m about to walk the plank or into a torture chamber.. whichever one is worse… then when this trip is over we get to switch nights and days again when we return to Abu Dhabi. awesome.

Once “Hell week” is over with it is time to try and do what we came here for – visit family and friends.  Then you get requests like, Y’all have to come and visit! Please come over, bring the kids.. DANG, didn’t I just come half way around the world. !?!? I’d say the fair split in the middle would be to meet somewhere in Europe, but since we are already in the states how bout you come to me? LOL.

Away from Father and Hubby: The kids and I have lots of fun and stay super busy which distracts us from the pain of missing their daddy / my husband for an entire month.  Have you ever traveled away from your spouse for a month? not easy.  We miss him terribly. He has learned that if he is curious as to what we are up to or where we have been, he just checks the credit card bill and can give you a play by play of our day… sometimes including 3 trips to sonic in the same day.   It has to be lonely here in the villa all by himself with empty beds at night.  I could never leave my kids for more than a week, much less a month, I’m not sure how he does it, but then again he’s a man, it is different for them. He admits the first week is pretty wonderful and peaceful, but after that it totally sucks.  I’m grateful that he loves us enough to let us go for so long.  Since we barely get a chance to hear his voice because of the time difference, we long to see his face when he finally arrives!  The good news is that he’s in America with is, the bad news is that it means it is almost time for us to go. 

Leaving: The revolving door of good-byes is part of being an ex-pat.  You have to say goodbye year after year to friends that have become your family, knowing  you may never see them again usually about this time of year.  Equally awful: having to watch your kids constantly let go of friendships as their parents move away… as you can imagine, the absolute worst are the painful goodbyes to family as you know another year will pass before you will hug their necks and they will kiss their grandkids/nieces/nephew…. wondering what all you will miss in the meantime. It is SO HARD.  But we’re not going to think about that right now… happy thoughts.

As the joys of summer approach, I try my best to focus on the good because in the end, it is all 100% worth it. Our families are just that amazing.  If it wasn’t worthwhile we would not do this over and over again… trust me!